It’s official, Wedding Season is upon us. If, like Katherine Heigel in “27 Dresses,” you’re finding that you’re always a bridesmaid but never a bride, now is the time to embrace the upside of being single! Even when attending, let’s say, your best friend’s wedding.

Let’s examine a case study to illustrate what NOT to do:

Maria is the maid of honor at Sasha’s wedding. At age 29, she’s feeling the pressure from her traditional Italian family to hurry up and produce some bambinos - pronto. Mamma mia! What’s a signorina to do?

Maria proceeds to get drunk during dinner, partly to dampen her jealousy over Sasha’s beautiful husband, wedding, honeymoon and gifts, partly to summon the courage to flirt with Sasha’s cute cousin sitting beside her. She flirts. He flirts back. They sleep together. He doesn’t call the next day. Or the next. Or the next. Maria goes crazy with the pain of rejection and does a “drive by” his house. In less than a week, she has downgraded herself from reasonably desirable to desperate. Not exactly the “happily ever after” she was hoping for. How did it all go so wrong?

Maria’s Mistake #1: Focusing on One Guy

According to relationship expert and Ph.D. Dr. Diana Kirschner, the #1 mistake women make in dating is getting hung up on one guy. In other words, our eyes meet across a crowded room and we convince ourselves that Darryl the dentist is the The One when really, we have no idea who Darryl is, other than a professional with really white teeth.

Dr. Diana says women should try dating three men at the same time. Yes, three men for at least 2-3 months, no sex and no serious hanky-panky. (And you must be honest with the guys about this). The idea is to get to know three different people slowly which also raises self-esteem. Think: The Bachelor.

Maria’s Mistake #2 – Sex Too Soon

Another mistake women make is sleeping with a new guy too soon. Not to get parental, but Mom was right: hitting the sack with a new man too soon is a recipe for disaster. When we have sex, our bodies produce huge amounts of “feel good” hormones including oxytocin, a bonding chemical. Hello? Bonding – as in the emotional equivalent of crazy glue. This means your body can become attached to a guy you don’t even really like. And that makes it all the harder to break up when you realize that (a) you have nothing in common and (b) he’s actually kind of a jerk.

Maria’s Mistake #3 – Feeling the Pain, not the Pleasure of Being Single

Don't underestimate singleness, ladies. This is the time to create the best life you can for yourselves. So what if the bride-to-be has a dozen new crockpots? She may seem to be on Cloud 9 now but just wait until the honeymoon’s over and she discovers her new husband’s secret penchant for porn! A few months from now she’ll be calling you up desperate for a Girls Night - and you’ll know exactly how to showcase the best part of single life – if you haven’t already found a gorgeous man with a heart of gold for yourself!

by Lisa Summers