My husband and I have lived in a certain downtown condominium for nearly 3 years, and we have yet to hear a single concierge make a fire alarm announcement that sounds like they know what they are doing - much less like they know how to speak. I find this highly annoying.

Take tonight's alarm at midnight: 12:00am - Dude leans on a warning buzzer for about 45 seconds, which is done to notify us of an upcoming intercom announcement. Different concierge hold it down for different lengths of time. Some to the point where you want to go downstairs and throttle them. It is a very loud, horrible sound, of which, 5 seconds or less would be more than sufficient.

12:06am - Crackling and chewing sound (Dude was probably eating a sandwhich or something). Attentionattention (chomp, chomp slurrrp!) There is a, um, this is the concierge... ... speaking... ... Mumble, mumble mumble (chew chew gulp)... Fire department (more terrible mouth sounds)... notifiedstayin... ...yourunitsattentionattention (and repeat of above horrendous sounds).

For some reason the fire alarm in our building goes off up to several times a week. I'm sure Toronto Fire Services is not pleased. This means we are exposed to horrendous concierge Fire Alarm announcements on a regular basis and it ticks me off every time because they are always horrible like the one tonight.

Luckily, this time as my ears were assaulted once again, I devised a fool proof plan for them to prevent this from happening again... Read More...