Super Elastic Black Tites (Sports Wear)

My overall rating

I am an ancient old man these days, but once upon a time I took strict ballet lessons, and I love the sensual feeling of being in good shape. So please check this out, if you live in or near Vancouver, Canada. This is a totally no-perks, unsolicited...   +

I am an ancient old man these days, but once upon a time I took strict ballet lessons, and I love the sensual feeling of being in good shape. So please check this out, if you live in or near Vancouver, Canada. This is a totally no-perks, unsolicited sweet recommendation for both the PRODUCT AND THE PLACE

Vancouver is made for jogging the Seawall, wearing spandex for coffee, and looking good in sophisticated tites walking the dog. Everybody wears tites. ("Tites" is my own way of spelling second-skin spandex yoga leggings, tights, whatever. But you know what I mean. When it rains in Vancouver (and you know it DOES) you wear two pairs; or when you are just hanging out. There are fantasy styles that cause old guys to walk into power poles, and there are super-duper styles that show you off like a superstar only better. Because another thing everyone knows about Vancouver, is that the most to-die-for heart-attack women in the world live here.

But what's a girl to wear, if she is short just a few million dollars from being a Queen of the Hundred-Dollar Titeswear Shops? Oh, she might have one or two pairs of terribly expensive pairs of tites, but--and here it comes--what can she afford, really and truly, if she is young, beautiful, and basically broke? And here is the answer.

Downtown, on Richards Street toward Pender Street, there is a little store with an "80% OFF" sign outside. Its real name is DISTRICT FACTORY OUTLET. It looks cheap and it IS cheap, but the people who run the tiny place are the BEST people in the Whole Wide World. And when you go there, tell whomever is at the desk that you are looking for $10 - Yes, TEN DOLLAR - Super Elastic Wear BLACK TITES. They are in a bunch of flat packages at the back corner of the little store. The biggest word on the package is WOMAN. And it says SPORTS WEAR and below that, AIR NAPPING. WOW! To tell you the honest truth, when you wear them, you KNOW you are gorgeous! Well, your LEGS are gorgeous, anyway!!

These are Chinese-made tites. There are just two sizes, so far as I know. Medium and Large. They are so fabulous, and so totally basic black, that my guess is you could fool your best friends into thinking you paid a hundred dollars for them. I kid you not! I already owned Cappezios and Danskin and a whole bunch more of the Golly-they-sure-COST beautiful-people tites, but I looked and looked and LOOKED for the perfect tites that were all-black, as sexy as my legs, and CHEAP! Well, these are the answer to my dreams! And I don't look ANYWHERE NEAR as good as you!

Take a looksee. If you agree you look fabulous in these tites, and they are a fantastic buy, then look me up and give me a big kiss! I won't mind.

Tips: You don't have to wash them first, but they will bleed off some black colour when they are new.    -