I still can’t believe how this played out

I am incredibly disappointed with my tattoo experience and the artist - so much so that I will never recommend her or go back to that studio. After some reflection, I am writing this so someone else not familiar with the process of getting a tattoo is aware of the potential lazy/negligent treatment they might receive here. I also encourage others to walk away when they’re seeing some of the red flags outlined below. My interaction really diminished the overall experience, neutralizing the excitement that comes with getting a tattoo.
I had a consultation appointment in Nov 2019. I had researched Jay's work, decided on a rough design idea more than a year earlier, and was more than ready to take the plunge. I didn’t have a ton of expectations on the design particulars, just a few pictures of the flower, and was looking forward to her advice and artistic approach. The design I wanted, although not small, was fairly straightforward and she had done something similar in the past. She pulled up a previous design drawn for someone else - i noted some changes I’d like and explicitly, super politely, asked her to take a fresh crack at it. She told me I should be able to book within the month, given the simplicity of the line work, and that she would send me a copy of the adjusted design reflecting our discussion so we could make any necessary changes before my appointment. It appeared like she had been taking notes but almost no changes to the old design she pulled up had been made. I took this as a positive, having not wanted someone else’s design, but a fresh attempt. When I got to the front counter to book, I was asked to pay a deposit and was a bit taken aback. I felt it was odd to ask for payment when I hadn’t seen the final design, but I paid and booked a spot, trusting Jay would work with me to ensure the design met my expectations. I was prepared to invest in this tattoo and as a new client and this being my first tattoo, I didn’t know the protocol or know what i needed to consider at that juncture. The woman at the counter wasn’t impressed by my surprise or question. Overall, the consultation was underwhelming but I wanted to trust that Jay would collaborate with me over email on the new drawing i had asked her to make.
The day before my appointment, I still hadn’t heard from Jay or seen a mockup of what I wanted. I reached out to her on social media during work hours (insta, where she is quite active), admittedly anxious i hadn’t heard from her. After two hours of not hearing from her, i emailed the salon to ensure she would get my message, signalling that the design hadn’t reached me and for her to call me. I simply wanted an update and some reassurance given her previous promises to collaborate on the image leading up to the appointment. She eventually got back to me, ignoring my request to chat over the phone and attached the mockup, showing ZERO changes from the consultation. She kind of apologized but then went on to imply that I should have raised my concern earlier and that we could make changes at the appointment. Gaslighting 101. I didn’t really have concerns until I didn’t hear from her, and it was clearly her responsibility to have emailed me, leaving time for some thought and perhaps even feedback on my end pre-appointment. I had been so excited to work with her so was incredibly deflated and anxious - it was obvious by that email that she hadn’t touched the original sketch since meeting me weeks earlier. Everything online told me to trust my tattoo artist so I checked my hesitation and hoped that in the 24 hours before the appointment, she’d start the work she promised.
I arrived at the appointment and no changes had been made - that’s wasn’t the kind of art i wanted on my body. I asked her if she had drawn a new one but she skirted the question, noting we could make any changes before she starts. She left no room for the tattoo design to be mine; to capture my experience and vision. I was incredibly intimidated and discouraged, I wanted the tattoo, and the sketch was a version of what I wanted, so I got it done.
In all honesty, I look at my tattoo now and have regrets. Regrets that I allowed lazy behavior and a fraction of an apology to go unchallenged; that in trusting the artist, l let my guard down / questioned myself; and that i spent that much money on a tattoo that doesn’t reflect my request. I never expected hand holding but I deserved more (or any) client care, communication and respect. I’ve since had friends with tattoos and another local artist in Ottawa confirm that this experience was uncool and unprofessional. I can only imagine how hard it is for tattoo artists to meet client expectations, but I went in having done my research, broadly knowing what i wanted, and wanting to leverage this artist’s advice and talent. Unfortunately, trusting the artist and not being difficult served me quite quite poorly.
If you see something the artist has done and want that exact piece, go for it! But it’s also ok to not want a drawing the artist did for someone else. Don’t expect much by way of customer service.